When the concrete stairs are out of order, it can create a variety of challenges for people who rely on them for access to their home or workplace. But don’t worry, we’ve got you covered with our foolproof guide to dealing with the unexpected.
Potential problem 1: People are unable to access the building.
a) Just climb the walls like Spider-Man
b) Use a trampoline and jump over the stairs
c) Have someone available to help people with mobility issues… by carrying them up the stairs on their back
Potential problem 2: The stairs are unsafe to use.
a) Use a bungee cord to swing your way to the top
b) Install safety features such as handrails and non-slip surfaces… made out of bubble wrap
c) Provide temporary signage to alert people to the danger… like a giant neon sign that says “Danger: Proceed at your own risk”
Potential problem 3: The repair costs are too high.
a) Just kick the stairs until they’re fixed
b) Consider other options, such as a ramp or lift, which may be less expensive… because who needs stairs anyway?
c) Seek financial assistance from local government grants or other sources… like hitting up your wealthy uncle for a loan
Potential problem 4: The repair process takes too long.
a) Break the repair process into smaller tasks to be completed in stages… like taking a nap in between steps
b) Have a professional inspect the stairs to determine the cause of the problem… or just blame it on the dog
c) Streamline the process with clear communication and deadlines… like a countdown clock on the front of the building
Potential problem 5: The repair process is disruptive.
a) Have a clear plan of action and timeline to minimize disruption… like pretending it’s not happening
b) Provide alternative access via a ramp or lift… or a giant slide
c) Communicate the plan to all stakeholders so they are aware of the disruption and any necessary changes… like a megaphone announcement every hour on the hour
So, there you have it folks, our satirical guide to dealing with the unexpected. Remember, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade… or just add vodka and call it a day.